Philip apology and promise, medical notes, background

Philip asked me to post this letter from him.  I put notes on his medical condition below that, and the previous posting of his story, my satire, and my editorial comment below that.  Tim Campbell

Frank Tritico, Chair

Lambda Houston

1201 W Clay

Houston TX 77006

January 29, 2012

Frank:

After studying Tim Campbell’s write-up of my banishment by the Lambda Board, I understand more specifically what I am doing wrong than I did from previous verbal and written warnings from the board.  I request once again to be allowed to attend meetings at Lambda.  Lambda is a big and important part of my life.  Lambda may not need me, but I sure need Lambda.

I now know, from the specific clarity of Tim’s written material, that my kissing and touching offend some people. Consequently, I promise to never kiss people at Lambda again, and never to touch or play with their chests and or muscles or other body parts, not even jokingly.

I am very sorry my behavior has bothered some people and promise not to do that in the future.

Once again I ask that you respond to my request some days prior to birthday night at Lambda for February 2012.  I would very much like to get my 16-year medallion that night at Lambda.

Respectfully,

Philip Bowman

525 Heights Blvd Apt 6

Houston TX 77019

713 864-5520

cc: Tim Campbell for email distribution

Phenytek from Physicians Desk Reference 2007 p 2160-1

Philip takes medications for seizures (phenytoin sodium or Phenytek) daily and reliably.  The PDR notes:  “Phenytoin is and antiepileptic drug...Phenytoin tends to stabilize the threshold against hyperexcitability caused by excessive stimulation or environmental changes....  Phenytek Capsules are indicated for the control of generalized tonic-clonic (grand mal) and complex partial (psychomotor, temporal lobe) seizures and prevention and treatment of seizures during or following neurosurgery."

Epilepsy Encyclopaedia Britannica CD 1998

“Epilepsy, sudden and recurrent disturbances in mental function, state of consciousness, sensory activity, or movements of the body, caused by paroxysmal malfunction of cerebral nerve cells.  Epilepsy includes generalized convulsions in which there is sudden unconsciousness with falling and shaking of limbs (grand mal), momentary lapses of awareness (petit mal), as well as other types of activity that may include bizarre  automatic behavior, strange memories, illusory and hallucinatory experiences, and changes in mood.”

Onset of seizures.  “In more than 50 percent of persons with generalized convulsions, there is some evidence of a beginning in a local area (of the brain). Focal onset may be manifested by localized movements or sensations of a part of the body or by subjectively experienced warnings, called auras, that last from a fraction of a second to a few seconds.  Auras arising from specific areas of the brain include illusions that the environment is strangely familiar, auditory or visual hallucinations, ringing in the ears, and unpleasant odors or tastes.  Although part of the seizure proper, auras are considered warnings of an impending attack.

Defect following brain surgery

“Surgical operations on the sides of the brain (temporal lobes) to remove tissues that produce symptoms of epilepsy are routine.  While good results are often achieved, a degree of memory defect ensues.  Operations on the dominant (usually left) temporal lobe tend to hamper one’s ability to learn verbal information by hearing and reading...Operations on one temporal lobe where there is unsuspected damage to its fellow on the other side of the brain produce severe and persistent memory defect, altogether comparable to postencephalitic amnesia.”

AA Unity: Tradition 1.  Page 129 Paragraph 3

“We believe thee isn’t a fellowship on earth which lavishes more devote care upon its individual members; sure there is none which more jealously guards the individual’s right to think, talk, and act as he wishes.  No A.A. can compel another to do anything; nobody can be punished or expelled.  Are Twelve Steps to recovery are suggestions; the Twelve Traditions which guarantee A.A.’s unity contain not a single “Don’t.”  They repeatedly say “We ought...”but never “you must!”

Philip's brain-injury and his current problem

In the early 1990s, , Philip B was attacked by basher/s upon leaving the gay bars near Fairview and Stanford in Houston, Texas.  The attack left him with a major brain injury and he spent about three months in the hospital, much of it in intensive care at Ben Taub General Hopsital.

Prior to this attack and injury, Philip was a top salesman with a national firm.  You never met anyone more upbeat and outgoing.  Smiles all over the place.

Philip's brain injury did not take away his out going, extroverted personality.  He rarely remembers your name or persona, but he greets every smiling face with a hug and a kiss.  His shares in AA meetings are incredibly up beat, and usually end with "KISS, KISS, KISS, keep it simple sweetheart!"

Philip's problem is  that since his brain injury, he also greets most everyone smiling like an outrageous drag-queen emceeing the muscleman strip shows common in the gay bars:  That is, he gives people a little tongue, sometimes a tongue in the ear, and sometimes feels up their chest muscles like a muscle show emcee might.

In spite of  multiple warnings from individuals and the Lambda board, Philip can't get it through his brain-damaged head that this extroverted behavior is not making him popular.


Philip's success staying sober and being self-supporting 

Philip has been continuously sober since February 4, 1996.  He attends AA meetings around central Houston, mostly at Lambda which is a gay AA club with over 40 meetings each week.

Philip is entirely self-support doing maid service for individuals and often calls himself "Mucho Maid."



Lambda Board bars Philip Permanently

In mid May, 2011 the Lambda Board warned Philip that if they got any more complaints about him violating any of its over 20 long codes of conduct, he would be barred from Lambda permanently.  Lambda had already barred him several times. By July 8, this same board had already found reason to violate Philip again and barred him permanently from Lambda.  (Somehow, that's no surprise.)

Lambda barred Philip not only from it's lounge spaces, where all the trouble seems to occur, but also from all 45 of its meetings.   To my knowledge, Philip has never disrupted an AA meeting.

As of this writing (January 26, 2012) Lambda continues to refuse to allow Philip to attend meetings there.   He has requested in writing permission to celebrate his 16 years sobriety at Lambda at the end of February.  He is patiently awaiting Lambda's response.  A response may or may not come.

Satirical ad for AA bouncer

BOUNCER WANTED FOR AA CLUB.  Must enforce dress code, language code, manners code, and keep convicted offenders off our property.  Must keep bicycles out of building, prevent people from leaving umbrellas behind.  Ex-drunk with 2 years dry preferred.  Only large and ugly need apply.  Experience stopping crosstalk a plus.  Prior felony convictions no problem.  Lambda, 1201W Clay, Houston TX 77006 Equal Opportunity Employer.  Affirmative Action points for really tough women applicants. 713 521-1243.  Ask for Mykie or Francis.  Email chair@lambdahouston.org

(Tim is saving his shekels to run this satirical ad on Craig’s List if need be.  Wink.  Wink.  Wink.)

The Only Requirement for AA Membership

(Page 139 Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions published 1953)

“The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking.”

(First published by AA 1946 later confirmed at 1950 Convention in Cleveland.)

“This Tradition is packed with meaning.  For A.A. is really saying to every serious drinker, “You are an A.A. member if you say so.  You can declare yourself in; nobody can keep you out.  No matter who you are, no matter how low you’ve gone, no matter how grave your emotional complications—even your crimes—we still can’t deny you A.A.  We don’t want to keep you out.  We aren’t a bit afraid you’ll harm us, never mind how twisted or violent you may be.”

(This text was written by Bill Wilson himself.)

Editorial Comment by Tim Campbell

The only codes AA needs are Love thy neighbor as thyself and our primary purpose is to stay sober and to help others achieve sobriety.  Those who claim we need special language codes, dress codes and manners codes worry too much.  Although we’d like AA meeting places to be reasonably safe environments, we need to remember that AA exists to help sociopathic users of alcohol and drugs.  Many of us come in ruff.  Many, like me, also remain ruff.  Gay AA places need to remember that our community comprises of many outrageous personalities and many prudes.  Good gay club management should not take sides.  We are all grownups.  We can work out our differences without much supervision from boards.